https://www.facebook.com/irwin.r.walker

The following is a short autobiography written by Randy.

My name is Randy. My story is full of heartbreak. It is also full of Love. God's love for sinners. You, Me, or any of Gods children that need him and commit there life totally to Him. I hope all who read it get some good from it. I feel it must be told so that maybe if it helps even one soul that has strayed it will be worth all I have been through. God has watched out for me in my personal nightmare. I'm not proud nor ashamed of what happened. I was so far from God it just took losing everything before I finely cried out for HELP. This is my plea to you all for help.

In Oct. my wife and I were going to Tulsa OK. to spend the night. In the morning we were catching a plane to New Orleans for a week cruise. I decided to walk to a bar for a drink when we had checked in. I had took with me for the cruise, some illegal drugs. Well to make it shorter I got arrested . I spent all night and most the next day in the drunk tank, which was not pleasant. I did not know they had charged me with four counts of illegal drugs, two of which were prescription for my back. Suddenly I was looking at two years plus. I was in a lot of pain by two or three the next day. They moved me and three or four others in a holding cell with a Indian of about seven feet tall. He had been in a tank next to mine and we had not talked. At the time I didn't know that God was already watching out for me. The Indian brought over a mat and the only blanket and gave them to me saying, “Walker don't worry; stick with me. It will be ok.” A few hours latter they came and got us. Shackled our feet and hands together along with thirteen others. I was so scared and humiliated. I knew my wife didn't know where I was. Once again God knew. I was next to the Indian and he kept saying “Walker stick with me”. Thinking back I had never told him my name. We were drove to a detention center a short distance away, moved in side as other inmates were cat calling nasty things I won't put into words. Having never been in any trouble, it was the scariest thing I had ever been through. We were thrown into a small holding cell. So small there wasn't room to sit.

A couple hours later the guards came and assigned us to the cells we were to be in. My name was called and I was told A cell. The Indian said, “Come on Walker, let's go,” and he grabbed our mats.

A cell had about 80 men all yelling “fresh meat” and other things. By this time reality had hit very hard. The Indian put my mat on my bunk and said, “Come on let's get cleaned up.” We were filthy. All the holding cells I had been in were nasty. With open showers and eighty men looking and hollering at us, a shower was the last thing I wanted. I wanted to crawl under my blanket and cry. He said again, “Walker come on let's get cleaned up”, so I grabbed my towel and we went to the back to the showers. The inmates seemed to stay away from us. They went up towards the front and forgot about us. We showered without a problem, which I found out later is not common. The Indian walked me to my bunk then I saw him get into his bunk and pull the covers over his head. I didn't sleep that night at all.

The next morning when it was time to eat I went to the bunk the Indian had got into and He wasn't there. Once again no one bothered me. It was like I had been there for a while and knew the inmates around the bunks where we were. Instead of a tall Indian in the bunk there was someone else. I asked the inmates around where the Indian, the real tall one that had got in the bunk last night was? The answer I got was the same from anyone. “What Indian? No Indian was here man!” The guy in the bunk had been there a while. I asked many. No one had seen My Angel God had sent to help me get settled into- MY own personal nightmare.

I was there 44 days. Before a week had passed I found out my wife had left me and went home. Changed the phone number and filed for divorce. I had lied one time too many!

It seems in life, if you do anything illegal and are asked about it, no matter how much you love someone, you lie. Or I did any way. To this day I ask myself why? I don't have a answer except God had a plan for my salvation. At this time I was at rock bottom. I decided to end my life. Little did I know God wasn't going to let me. I had made a knife out of my back brace I was wearing. I had been doing drugs for many years. Lying to my wife more all the time about many things. Two years before I had hurt my back and it cost me my business. I was a builder. Without being able to work and support my family, I was already fighting depression.

Doctor bills were adding up, My wife was half through nursing school, and bills were really piling up. I was on many prescription drugs plus the ones I sold, and did myself. My kids are 15 and 13. It was hard for me to not be able to support my family. This is no excuse, it is part of the process of putting me in a place where I thought there was no hope. So I thought. I still had no idea that my plans and God plans were no where near the same. The very night I had decided to end it all, God sent a inmate to come over and pick a fight with me. I am not a violent person. I do not like violence, but will not walk from it either. When this inmate said he was going to kill me it woke me up to what I was going to do myself. There is a poem I got that really describes what God can do when we surrender our selves to him.
(I still couldn't at this time even though I knew I needed Him in my life.)

“Mother-love is not always
warm, cuddly and sentimental.
Sometimes all it can do is cry
to God for Help and then hang
on for all its worth.”

Well, if you have never lost God, you will never know the feeling of total despair, that came over me. Knowing that because of what I had done, I had lost every thing that I loved. I believe the letter I got from Kitty said “You gambled, you lied, you lost!! I filed for a divorce. Don't come home!” They were the most agonizing words I have ever read! And still are.

Before I got the letter, I prayed to God for HELP and forgiveness for all the lies and the deep hurt I had caused my family. I called my folks, told them where I was, and what had happened. I also told them I'd like to take bible studies. Mom said My brother, Leonard was the distributor in N. Calif. I requested they be sent to me. I know how hard this was for mom and dad to hear. How I had been busted for drugs and about Kitty. I told them all. It still is very hard for me to remember without weeping. My folks are the greatest, and told me they love me no matter what I had done.

About this same time I requested a visit from a chaplain. I didn't have a bible, and needed to get all this off my chest. I was crying out to God for help but the pain was more than I could take. The next Wed. Nov. 4, I got my visit. The chaplain prayed with me and gave me my first bible. When he signed it for me I saw his name was Leonard. I took my bible and started reading it.

That night at mail call I got my first letters. Mom had written, also Lenny, and Betty had written and sent the first Discovery Bible studies. I also found out Kitty had called my folks and Lenny and Betty and told them of all I had done.

There were two sets of studies sent as another inmate wanted to do them also. We eagerly opened them up when I heard three for church. Out of 80+ only three could go to church. We ran to the bars and were able to go .That night I accepted God in my life! A couple from Africa were there and the pastor kept looking at me and finally asked what was wrong. I told him, and he said God had forgave me, I had asked Kitty and the Kids to forgive me, now I had to forgive myself. As he prayed for me, I felt a great calm come over me. It didn't last as I still couldn't forgive myself. I struggled for a long time until I realized I couldn't do anything myself. I needed God to help me. This is when I realized I was still trying to run my life. I prayed and told God that I give up the drivers seat and would do what ever He asked!

Things really started happening! God is so wonderful and good when you give Him everything. By the time I was set free by God there were about 25 inmates doing bible studies. Lenny had called the local pastor of Tulsa S.D.A. church, Pastor Philips. God worked through Pastor Philips and allowed him to be able to have some contact visits with me. That is not normal procedure. Every time the Pastor came he brought books, lots of books. He gave me lots of support and his prayers were good for my soul. He was the only contact I had after Kitty left me. My two kids wrote along with my folks and Lenny and Betty. Betty started putting notes with scripture on them in the studies. I got to where I looked for them. I completed all twenty-six studies while in jail.

I also was asked to have special prayer for an Inmate that had court. By the next morning the list had filled up one page and I had started another .The answers started the first day. I was surprised how many God answered. I shouldn't have been , but one after another were answered.

My court date was finally coming up, the first Monday after Thanksgiving. I was very scared. To go to court they handcuffed and shackled us hand and foot. It is a most degrading and humiliating experience. I went a total of four times. Two of them, I was that way fourteen hours. Lots of time to think and pray.

On Monday I saw my attorney for the first time. She said they wanted to give me two years. I said no way! I want out. I would take a longer probation or what ever. I just wanted out. She went and talked to the prosecuting attorney and worked out a deal. If I would let them do a FBI background check, I just might get out the next Friday with a two year deferred sentience. Which means if I don't get into trouble, it is going to be wiped of my record. I really don't think the attorney thought I would pass.

Before this I had asked Lenny and Betty if I could come stay with them till I got back on my feet. Both knew that this was a big responsibility for them. They knew what a challenge it would be, as they had opened their house and hearts once already to our sister who also fought a drug addiction problem. With no hesitation, both said come. Remember no drugs .No smoking. No alcohol. Just God and us. They have the strongest love for the Lord I have ever seen. I love them very much for what they are still doing. I'm still with them and will be for a while. We are growing stronger in our faith every day. God bless them.

I told my lawyer I was going to CA to my brothers when I got out. She said no problem just a phone call. That Thursday the Drug Enforcement Agency went to our farm and told Kitty I was trying to pick up the lady cop that arrested me. Also, I had been turned in for making methamphetamine. They just knew they would find a drug lab and I would be in for a very long time. They scared Kitty so bad by their lies she never thought about it when they asked her to sign a paper so they could search the house and farm. She was very angry with me., not knowing I had signed a paper allowing them to do this. All I knew was she had abandoned me, and if I was going to get out, I would let them look anywhere. They found nothing, but left a wife that wanted nothing to do with me. I knew nothing of what had happened yet.

The next day once again in handcuffs and in shackles, I was took to court. My case wasn't called that morning. When you are an inmate and in court, you sit with handcuffs the whole time.
At around three-forty my case was called. The judge looked for my file and no one could find it. He called for a recess to see what had happened. We sat and waited. there was about five cases left. I have never prayed so hard. Not that God would get me out, but for strength to except whatever happened. I had faith that no matter what the out come, it was what God had planned. At five, I had come to the realization that I would not be getting out that night. The courts adjourn at five. At five twenty the bailiff came out and said, “All rise”. Out came the judge. Court was in session. They called another case, the man had one joint. His second offense. He got five years. This scared me bad. I knew they wanted to give me two years and I didn't know the out come of the back ground check, even though I had never been in trouble before. Another case was called, this one first degree assault. The inmate had stolen a wallet and in doing so, had pushed the man. His lawyer had made a deal and he got fifteen years! I'm having a hard time holding back the tears. I just know I'm in big trouble. I forgot God was in the drivers seat. Its so easy to do. We get scared or start worrying about the out come of something, when if we give it to all to God all we need is faith and sit back.
There were many texts that gave me strength to endure the trials God put me through. Some of my favorites are
Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up on wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary
They shall walk and not faint.
Is.40:31
Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened or dismayed, for the Lord our God is with you where ever you go.
Josh 1:9
I kept repeating these over and over. Then I heard the words the State of OK verses Irwin Randall Walker. It still sends shivers down my spine. I still had not talked to my lawyer at all that day and had no idea what to expect. The Judge asked me if every thing he read is the truth. I said it was. He asked how I plead? I told Him Guilty, because I was. He said, “Stand for sentencing,” and I get up as best I can. A great calm came over me. The judge looked at me and said two year deferred with eighty hours community service, court costs to be paid on a monthly payment. All transferable to CA. I all most fainted! God set me FREE! It was almost six at this time. I asked one of the guards how often the judge held court late. He said it was the first time he knew of! I was the only one let out. It usually takes six to eight hours to process the paper work after you get your walking papers.
I had already asked Pastor Philips if he could get me and put me up till I could get things arranged. At eight o'clock With God leading me I was out on the street! It only took God two hours instead of six to eight.
I called Pastor Philips and he came and got me and took me to their home. I have much respect and gratitude for him and his wife. They took in a stranger, clothed and fed me. I spent the weekend with them and went to a real church for the first time. It was wonderful. I'll never forget what they have done for me.
On Sunday I made plane reservations for Monday. One for six then one for three. Kitty's folks had said they would bring some clothes for me along with the divorce papers. It is a three hour drive and they arrived in the afternoon. God was still working miracles for me. My ex-partner and his dad decided to buy my share of our property and tools we still had. It was enough to buy a plane ticket , pay all court costs and more. God is so good. Until they came I still wasn't sure how I was going to get to Lenny's in California.
When I looked at the divorce papers they were wrong. I would not sign them. Once again God was working, and he still is. I still haven't received any papers. Which is one of many reasons I have wrote this hard, sad letter, that is full of Miracles God has worked in my life to bring me out of OK. to CA.
Now to my favorite wonderful example of what God can do. Many years ago He knew where I would be and why. It is almost more than a person can comprehend unless you know God personally as I have come to know Him. He is my best friend. He took all cravings and desires away. Not once have I wanted a cigarette or and other drug after I asked him to take the habits away. I had enough on my mind with out fighting a drug habit too.
Well my father- in- law took me Monday morning, at eight to see my probation officer. When I had filled out the paperwork and went into his office, he told dad to wait outside. I told him I had a plane ticket for three because my lawyer had told me all it took was a phone call to get transferred. He started laughing and said those blankly lawyers, they have no idea! He told me it took two to three weeks! I wasn't going anywhere. Forget that plane. I was devastated. Where was I going to stay for two weeks or more? Then he made a comment about he was from Santa Cruz and I had better not trash the state. I looked at him and said I had went to school at Monterey Bay. He looked at me and said Randy? We were friends and classmates in 74. Neither of us could believe it. He said, “Well we have got a three o'clock plane to get you on.” He sent me to pay my fines while he got on the phone.

It was afternoon by the time I got back. He was still on the phone and not very happy. It turned out that CA wanted nothing to do with me. He didn't know what to do. The judge had made a mistake, writing that my deferred probation could be transferred. He called his boss and asked him what to do. He told the story and his boss said put him on the plane. “Make his a write in.” I was on the three o'clock plane and arrived in CA on the same day. I was told it took three weeks. . If they wanted to I could have had to go before the judge for re-sentencing. God is so wonderful.

I'm writing to you all, asking you to take this prayer request to The Lord, with Lenny, Betty, Irwin, Gail, Irvin, Esther, all the wonderful church members at Brownsville SDA church and myself. I have started bible studies and will be re-baptized when I get through. I do not want to lose my wife and my family. I love Kitty with all my heart. She has also told me she still loves me. I have hurt her so very deeply she cannot trust me, she says. I was told on New Years Day, She had been back to the lawyers and had told him to change the divorce papers and send them. Jan. 6th I called and talked to the our kids, Missy who is 15, and Joseph who is 13. Kitty picked up the phone and we had our first good talk. God is working Hard. She told me to call back the next day. Tonight when I called she had been to see the lawyer again and told him to hold the papers. For us to be a family, Kitty has to leave our home of 18 years and move also. I cannot go back. This March we will have been married 19 years. I'm asking everyone of you to help me and take my family on as a special prayer request. They are very special to me. Sent this request on to any and all you know please. Kitty is still running from God but is beginning to wonder if she has done the right thing.

Thank you all.

Sincerely your brother in Christ,

Irwin Randall Walker (Randy)

His obituary read:

IRWIN RANDALL “RANDY” WALKER
Irwin Randall “Randy” Walker, 55 of Springdale, Arkansas died Thursday, June 16, 2011 at Northwest Medical Center in Springdale.  He
was born March 16, 1956 in Madera, California to Irwin Dale and Gail Gwendolyn Larson Walker.  Mr. Walker was a member of the
Springdale Seventh Day Adventist Church.  He was known for his BBQs, and enjoyed camping, fishing, and especially time with his
granddaughter, Kennedy.

He is survived by his wife, Jana Walker, of the home; four children, Missy Wieden and husband Mark of Springdale, Joseph Walker of
Harrison, AR, Josh Perdew of Springdale, Tracy Perdew of Superior, WI; a brother, Lenny Walker and wife Betty of Chowchilla, CA; a
sister, Deanna Walker of Marysville, CA; and three grandchildren, Kennedy Wieden, Ethan Perdew and Mariah Perdew.

A memorial service was Wednesday, June 29, at Springdale Seventh Day Adventist Church.